So what should i do?

Monday i received a phone call from the VP of the bank that has given us a loan for our building.  It was a conference call and couldn't have come at a worse time.  We have never been late on a payment and we have never missed a payment in our 4 year history of owning this building.  Back to the conversation . . .

"Reverend Garner, we are going to terminate our relationship with you."--VP C___.

"Can you explain what that translates into?" I asked.

"Yes.  We. . . "  awkward silence and then 10 minutes of rambling in ambiguity, bankinese, and circles at the end of which they said, "we are calling the loan."

I was so perplexed.  I have struggled and struggled financially to keep the reputation and integrity of our church intact.

Finding another loan for our church right now in this market would be next to impossible.  And we certainly wouldn't get the 7.45% fixed interest rate we have now.  I feel betrayed and angry, exasperated and frustrated.  I want to cry, yell, get in someone's face and confront this dastardly act of injustice.  I want to call KRON 4 NEWS and tell them about how we are getting shafted from a bank.  You get the point.

If that wasn't enough I open a letter from another entity who are requesting my presence for questioning on related matters.  Last time I met with this group I returned only to pass out on the street in front of the church.

So what should i do?

We have just completed 40 days of community fasting.  It really was incredible.  Kimo, a wonderful Samoan leader, prayed for his sister-in-law who had died and she came back to life. Another lady in our church needed a $55,000 miracle or she was going to lose her house to foreclosure and God performed two miracles and someone gave her the cash and paid off all her bills.  Another man in the church needed a miracle to happen on his job or he would be terminated and it came through BIG TIME.  A whole lot of other things happened, but most profound for me was my prayer walks jumped me into a new kind of praying.  I pray everywhere i go, whispering petitions, love and thanks to God.  Somehow during all of this i have kept my faith in God.  I keep telling him, "I know you.  You are a loving Father who desires to bless me, gift me, promise me, and see me through.  I know you heart is tender toward us.  I know you are powerful, all powerful.  I trust you.  I trust your goodness toward us.  I trust your character."

I guess that is all i can do. 

No a miracle hasnt happened for me, yet.  I see the cloud the size of a man's hand.  Its the hand of love and grace that has never failed me.  I trust.  I cant help it. 

Comments

[Shiloh]

I will be praying for you tonight Jeff

[Jaime G]

We'll be praying for you, too. I'm sure this is very stressful, but we serve a big God! It's possible this is a blessing in disguise...

[Jacob F. Quijas]

Pastor, this is God's church and he will take care of it. Yes, we need a building but the people are more important! When God closes one door,He always opens another one. He will come through so get a good nights sleep and give all your worries to God, because he is going to be up all night anyway.

[Justin Richardson]

You,your family and SFLighthouse are in my prayers this week. God bless. I believe an awesome miracle is going to take place.